Thursday, September 27, 2007

Headache

I've had a headache for over a week now. It's like my brain doesn't want to accept the recent mental blow it took so it is rebelling against me. Imagine, if you can, the worst possible news you could hear.... no, that's not right, because there is one piece of news that I can imagine that would be worse and that would be her death.... this news was about a half a step up from death though. So imagine the second worse thing you could imagine hearing and you may understand why my brain is rebelling. On top of the boarder line migraine I also felt like my chest was going to cave in. Thankfully, that feeling dissipated after the initial shock.

My headache starts just behind my right eye and then pulsates diagonally to the back left hand side of my head. If the only thing I can think of is how much my head hurts I can't dwell on less pleasant things, right? Sigh.

So, what exactly was this terrible news? I can't tell you. That's why I told you to use your imagination. So, why am I writing a blog about it if I can't even talk about it? Anyone who's a real writer wouldn't ask that question, but for all of you who are just readers just know that the way to get something out of your head and off of your heart when you are a writer is to write it out. Remember when your high school councilor told you to keep a journal and to write in it when you are frustrated or angry? Yeah, they weren't suggesting that just to annoy you. It actually works for some of us. They also suggest writing a letter to the person you are angry with with no intentions of sending it. So, let me try that:

Dear Fuck-up,
I hope you rot in hell very soon.
Sincerely,
Someone who really hates you.

Hmmm, not quite as satisfying as I'd hoped, but oh well. Hopefully my online journal will help me a little more. So, here's the other thing that has been bothering me recently. When I found this awful news out I texted a friend. I was supposed to hang out with him the next day and I was hoping we could move that day up so I could try to distract myself from the crap news I had just received. I told him what was going on and unlike the couple other people I told he wasn't the most sympathetic about my issue. You see everyone else that knows what's going on were willing to drop everything to let me talk it out. This friend insisted that he couldn't change plans with his horribly skanky ex-girlfriend who had recently come back into his life. He had no reason why he couldn't change his plans, just that it was impossible. For some dumb reason I still went over to his house and the skank was there (of course), which made it impossible for me to talk about my issue and since I hate her so much, I was just angry most of the night. Sure it got my mind off of the bad news, but it didn't make me feel any better either.

Then a week goes by and I don't here from this so called friend. At this point I've revealed my problem to three other people. My boyfriend, my real best friend, and my boss. Three people that won't talk about it to anyone else and that will sympathize and help distract me. My boss I also told because I needed a few days off because of the issue. When I got back from my time off I realized I hadn't heard from my other friend since I had told him. This kind of pissed me off, but I didn't realize how much until the next day when this friend texted me. TO BORROW A BOOK. Not to ask my how things were going or if I'd heard anything new, nope. He wanted to borrow a book. Nice. So I let him have it. I told him that I regretted telling him about my problems because he obviously cared more about his skanky girlfriend who treated him like shit all the time than a friend who was there for him when his world fell apart.

I haven't spoken to him since the last text yesterday afternoon. I told him that luckily for him my phone was dying and I couldn't talk to him anymore. He hasn't tried to get a hold of me since then which really doesn't help his case. Let me be a little more fair and give you his excuse for not calling. He said it made him angry to think about it and he was waiting for me to bring it up again.

Gee, that's a good excuse.... I guess. My boss said that I could call her anytime, day or night. My best friend cried with me and offered all the assistance she could (which I had to decline because she wasn't supposed to actually know) and my boyfriend tried to distract me from thinking about it, but was very sympathetic about it at the same time. These are the reactions that people should give when something really crappy happens.... but I guess his feeling about the situation far outweighed mine. How selfish of me to not think about how this would affect him.

Sigh. Well, that helped with my issue with my friend. I got it off my chest if nothing else. Angry texts don't really get across the emotions of a good blog :D I didn't really expect to feel better about the real issue at hand after writing this blog (since I can't say anything definitive). That relief should come, in part, in a couple of days when it will be somewhat resolved.... and hopefully someone will be going to prison. It won't remedy what was done, but it will help knowing it won't happen again.

Okay, I'm done with my cryptic bullshit. You can go back to living your lives now.

Tuesday, September 11, 2007

Time to Clean Out the Ears.... Again

Yet another commercial I misheard.....

It was for Ford and it was talking about how they are always here for us and they have good safety ratings.... blah, blah, blah.....

At the end of the commercial there is a father/son moment. The kid looks like he's about 20, but they are attempting to play him off as 16. The father holds out the key to the kid and says, "You drive." and the kid looks all shocked and says, "Are you kidding me?"

Of course that's not what I heard. What I heard was, "Are you shitting me?" which would probably be more accurate with today's teenagers, but not likely to be on a commercial. So I jerked my head up and stared for a moment at the TV and again wondered, why don't they just put more reality in commercials? I can guarantee more people would remember that stupid commercial if the kid actually had said, "Are you shitting me?"