Don't know where I was going with this one, but I just found it among my other writtings and decided to post it here for anyone bored enough. It's not as bad as I remembered it, but I still have no clue where I was going with this one.
The first thing I remember was the sky, dark and clear. The moon was nowhere to be seen which meant it had already set or we were in the new moon phase. I couldn't really tell, but that somehow seemed important. To my right I could here the ocean swelling and receding, but the sand beneath me was dry and cool. I had no fear of the tide reaching this far up on the beach. The lids of my eyes scrapped up and down feeling like sandpaper until my eyes began to tear for moisture. How long had I been out here? I wiggled fingers and toes which were all bare and sand coated. Pain shot from all extremities inward pulling a gasp from deep in my chest. I clenched my fists and curled my toes until the pain finally subsided. Everything else was still aching, but at least I was able to move. When I was able to sit up and breathe normally I looked around to see if I could recognize my location. I couldn't, of course, but I did notice the boardwalk several feet to my left. I couldn't have been out here too long without someone noticing me. That was somewhat a relief.
The clothes I was wearing were unfamiliar and shredded. It looked like I had been mauled by a bear or some other wild animal, but there was no blood and I had no wounds bleeding or healing anywhere on my body. Whatever had destroyed my clothes apparently had no effect on me. I reached up to brush my hair back from my forehead and noticed for the first time that it was long, blonde and tangled to hell. Why did it shock me that I had blonde hair? That was the moment that the fear crept in. The more I tried to think about it the less I could actually recall about myself. I was sitting on some random beach in the middle of god knows what city or town and I had no idea who I was. There was nothing here that was going to give me any kind of a hint either. I didn't see a discarded purse that I could rifle through to gain more information about myself. What does one do? Where does one go when they have no idea....
I pushed the thoughts firmly to the back of my mind. I would just have to work with the knowledge I did have. It may be very little, but I wasn't completely helpless.
Thursday, May 29, 2008
Tuesday, May 27, 2008
Rilo Kiley Concert
It was pretty damn fantastic. Me, Hutch and Liz went down to the Slowdown around 7 o'clock because the ticket said 8:00. Well that meant the doors opened at 8 which meant we had plenty of time to sit around and watch Hutch get wasted. Liz and I were pretty sure that Hutch wasted a good $80 on alcohol that night (alcoholic). It's a nice bar so no one minded that we were there so early. My only problem with that slip up was that I hadn't had time to eat before I left. You see, this was the day before my brother's birthday and I was somehow required to stop by his house (by my mother) to celebrate. Unfortunately it was one of those times where I just dropped a card off and hoped for the best. He wasn't getting home until after seven and I couldn't wait that long. This was when my mother decided to drop the cancer bomb on me which made me feel worse because I couldn't talk to her about it. I had a 20 minute drive home to change and get to Hutch's. So, this random tangent that I went off on had no point other than what I previously stated: I didn't eat and was starved for the rest of the evening.
There were two start up bands. The first was meh. Not bad, but not memorable and not what I was there for. The second band was much better and Hutch actually bought their CD because he liked them so much. Which brings me to my second tangent. The price of the merchandise was reasonable at this concert. A first in history (for me anyway)! A hoddie for $30? Unheard of! Not that I bought anything, but I'm just sticking my tongue out (figuratively) and the person who felt the need to comment on my last concert blog about how the band earns their money by selling merchandise and that's why its so expensive, mer. Well, it seems not all of them are quite as desperate to make money. I was actually tempted to purchase one of their awesome t-shirts, but at the end of the day I didn't want to carry it around with me all night or wait in line at the end of the night. Remember, I'm exceedingly lazy.
Then, finally, the reason we were at the Slowdown got on stage!
As, I'm sure you all know by now, I did not take this or any other picture that night. I found these on Flickr because photobucket was shocking lacking in photos from the omaha concert. These pictures were from the show the previous night, but close enough. Every time they played a song I was pretty sure they had played all my favorites and I was satisfied.... and then they would play another song and that would be another one of my favorites. It was pretty fantastic except (and yes this will be the third tangent of the evening) the fact that I wore heals. Now, I had a reason for torturing my feet, I promise. I've been to concerts before and there's always some asshole that's 12 feet tall standing right in front of me and this time I was going to be prepared, damnit! So, it turned out to be entirely unnecessary because I took them off so the people behind me could see over my head and I just looked between bouncing heads in front of me to see the stage. I guess that's about all there is to say. With so little to complain about when it comes to the show and the venue I guess this will be a shorter than normal blog. Rock on, Rilo Kiley! You guys were awesome live.
As, I'm sure you all know by now, I did not take this or any other picture that night. I found these on Flickr because photobucket was shocking lacking in photos from the omaha concert. These pictures were from the show the previous night, but close enough. Every time they played a song I was pretty sure they had played all my favorites and I was satisfied.... and then they would play another song and that would be another one of my favorites. It was pretty fantastic except (and yes this will be the third tangent of the evening) the fact that I wore heals. Now, I had a reason for torturing my feet, I promise. I've been to concerts before and there's always some asshole that's 12 feet tall standing right in front of me and this time I was going to be prepared, damnit! So, it turned out to be entirely unnecessary because I took them off so the people behind me could see over my head and I just looked between bouncing heads in front of me to see the stage. I guess that's about all there is to say. With so little to complain about when it comes to the show and the venue I guess this will be a shorter than normal blog. Rock on, Rilo Kiley! You guys were awesome live.
Thursday, May 22, 2008
The "C" Word
Hey, dirty mind!
Cancer.
Oh, that "C" word. Yes, just as dirty, just as disgusting and tearing through our world and our lives. Yuck, what a piece of shit of a disease. Not that any disease is buckets of fun, but cancer just seems to be the crappiest because it goes anywhere and everywhere and they can't do much about it.... yet. This time its my mom dealing with it (along with millions of others, but I don't know them so I can't write about them).
It started with an ugly-ass mole on a forehead and ended up in the neck with thyroid cancer. Gee, those two things don't seem to be related? They're not, but that's how it was found. My mom had a mole quickly making itself known by growing out of her forehead like a unicorn's horn. She went to a dermatologist to have it removed and low and behold it had those little nasty cancer cells swimming around and screwing things up. So the doctor's decided some more testing was necessary and they were going to do that by taking a larger chunk of skin from her head. At the same time they were going to take a node out of her neck and her thyroid. I'm not sure how that decision was reached, but I'm assuming they did some test (an ultrasound or MRI or something along those lines) and saw a growth on her thyroid.
All did not go according to plan during surgery. The growth they had seen on her thyroid had wrapped itself around her trachea and when they were cutting it away they nicked her trachea. Damn. That sucks. So, a procedure that was supposed to be in and out turning into an ICU visit. They kept her sedated through the night and she was completely baffled the next day when she discovered most of a day had passed without her knowledge. They also still had the tube down her throat when I showed up at one o'clock in the afternoon. She was awake, choking and the doctor was no where to be found. The ridiculously understanding and nice nurse Jesse informed me that normal a tech could take it out, but since they had nicked the trachea during surgery they were being overly cautious and they wanted an anesthesiologist, a cardiologist and her surgeon present just in case anything went wrong and they had to put the tube back it. I understood that, but what I didn't understand was why the doctor wasn't coming now that she was awake. Shockingly the anesthesiologist was the first to show up (way to go guy) and the cardiologist was quick to follow. Then, forty-five minutes later, her doctor finally decides to amble his way up to the ICU (and no he didn't have a good excuse like surgery for why it took him forty-five minutes). They finally got the tube out of her throat and nothing happened, which is, of course, a good thing.
Final results finally came back and we discovered that the skin from her forehead was fine. The cancer hadn't gone into her lymph nodes and it seems all the cancer had been removed. Now, she has a "L" shaped scar right on her forehead, which she joked about in the hospital claiming that she was now officially a "Loser". The thyroid, however, had more cancer. Completely different and separate from the cancer that had been on her forehead. The whole thyroid had been removed, but they are going to be doing radiation therapy on her anyway. She has to completely change her diet. Apparently with thyroid cancer she cannot have any iodine in her diet for them to do the therapy. That translates into no iodized salt and no dairy. Holy crap, how much does that suck? Do you realize that damn near everything has salt in it? and in most cases that's the plain old iodized salt that she can't have?
Needless to say we are all still in the freak out stage of this mess, but we are figuring it all out and keeping everyone calm, especially my mom. I'm going to get her a bread maker so she can make her own salt-free bread and the online cookbooks have so many salt-less recipes that I have assured my mom that cooking foods won't be a problem. She is preparing for the fact that she will no longer be on her thyroid meds and therefore will be exhausted all the time and the fact that the radiation is going to leave a nice burn to go along with her choke scar from surgery. I'm trying to keep it light for her so she doesn't get depressed on top of all the other crap she's dealing with. I've already decided that she is going to be just fine and that I won't let her or anyone else say any different. It's three months of hell, but its not a lifetime and that's what matters, right?
Cancer.
Oh, that "C" word. Yes, just as dirty, just as disgusting and tearing through our world and our lives. Yuck, what a piece of shit of a disease. Not that any disease is buckets of fun, but cancer just seems to be the crappiest because it goes anywhere and everywhere and they can't do much about it.... yet. This time its my mom dealing with it (along with millions of others, but I don't know them so I can't write about them).
It started with an ugly-ass mole on a forehead and ended up in the neck with thyroid cancer. Gee, those two things don't seem to be related? They're not, but that's how it was found. My mom had a mole quickly making itself known by growing out of her forehead like a unicorn's horn. She went to a dermatologist to have it removed and low and behold it had those little nasty cancer cells swimming around and screwing things up. So the doctor's decided some more testing was necessary and they were going to do that by taking a larger chunk of skin from her head. At the same time they were going to take a node out of her neck and her thyroid. I'm not sure how that decision was reached, but I'm assuming they did some test (an ultrasound or MRI or something along those lines) and saw a growth on her thyroid.
All did not go according to plan during surgery. The growth they had seen on her thyroid had wrapped itself around her trachea and when they were cutting it away they nicked her trachea. Damn. That sucks. So, a procedure that was supposed to be in and out turning into an ICU visit. They kept her sedated through the night and she was completely baffled the next day when she discovered most of a day had passed without her knowledge. They also still had the tube down her throat when I showed up at one o'clock in the afternoon. She was awake, choking and the doctor was no where to be found. The ridiculously understanding and nice nurse Jesse informed me that normal a tech could take it out, but since they had nicked the trachea during surgery they were being overly cautious and they wanted an anesthesiologist, a cardiologist and her surgeon present just in case anything went wrong and they had to put the tube back it. I understood that, but what I didn't understand was why the doctor wasn't coming now that she was awake. Shockingly the anesthesiologist was the first to show up (way to go guy) and the cardiologist was quick to follow. Then, forty-five minutes later, her doctor finally decides to amble his way up to the ICU (and no he didn't have a good excuse like surgery for why it took him forty-five minutes). They finally got the tube out of her throat and nothing happened, which is, of course, a good thing.
Final results finally came back and we discovered that the skin from her forehead was fine. The cancer hadn't gone into her lymph nodes and it seems all the cancer had been removed. Now, she has a "L" shaped scar right on her forehead, which she joked about in the hospital claiming that she was now officially a "Loser". The thyroid, however, had more cancer. Completely different and separate from the cancer that had been on her forehead. The whole thyroid had been removed, but they are going to be doing radiation therapy on her anyway. She has to completely change her diet. Apparently with thyroid cancer she cannot have any iodine in her diet for them to do the therapy. That translates into no iodized salt and no dairy. Holy crap, how much does that suck? Do you realize that damn near everything has salt in it? and in most cases that's the plain old iodized salt that she can't have?
Needless to say we are all still in the freak out stage of this mess, but we are figuring it all out and keeping everyone calm, especially my mom. I'm going to get her a bread maker so she can make her own salt-free bread and the online cookbooks have so many salt-less recipes that I have assured my mom that cooking foods won't be a problem. She is preparing for the fact that she will no longer be on her thyroid meds and therefore will be exhausted all the time and the fact that the radiation is going to leave a nice burn to go along with her choke scar from surgery. I'm trying to keep it light for her so she doesn't get depressed on top of all the other crap she's dealing with. I've already decided that she is going to be just fine and that I won't let her or anyone else say any different. It's three months of hell, but its not a lifetime and that's what matters, right?
Monday, May 5, 2008
More Patient Tales
I thought this tale was best told via e-mail communications between my friend and I explaining what new annoyance I had at work today.
ME: So, I had a patient sitting out in the waiting room who was humming along (really loud) with the manwich jingle and then another commercial for Countryside Village came on and she started humming along with that one too. It was really obnoxious! I mean humming along at home or singing in your car is one thing, but that was bordering on me asking her to stop. This isn't karaoke or your living room. Stop being annoying please.
FRIEND: Manwich really? Wow! I would not blame you for saying something to her. More importantly though who actually knows the Manwich theme song!
ME: It's actually someone saying “Manwhich, Manwhich, I want Manwich” over and over again to a classical music tune. It's actually a pretty common tune. You'd probably know it if you heard it. But it was still annoying. Yeah, I can’t be that rude without getting fired, but I could see how it would get on someone's nerves to the point where they would blow up.
FRIEND: I guess if it was classical music it would make it that much harder to bare.
ME: Honestly, if this woman would have stopped when the commercial did I probably wouldn't have been so irritated with it, but she just kept humming through the next commercial until another one she knew came on :\
FRIEND: Was she senile?
ME: No. But she did get really excited when i took her back to her room. I said "we're going to have you here in room three" and she shoots her hands in the air and yells out "woo hoo! room three!" so she might just be on mass amounts of drugs.
FRIEND: Yes! Drugs! That is the only explanation for this! I never remember getting excited over which room the doctor put me in. I am going to do that next appointment!
ME: when they are walking you down the hall you should start muttering things like "come on room four, do i have a room four?" like Vegas roulette crazies.
FRIEND: I will do that while humming the Manwich theme song!
ME: have fun with that
FRIEND: You are my emergency contact so expect a phone call from my doctor committing me.
Okay, so is it just me or was this really an amusing tale?
ME: So, I had a patient sitting out in the waiting room who was humming along (really loud) with the manwich jingle and then another commercial for Countryside Village came on and she started humming along with that one too. It was really obnoxious! I mean humming along at home or singing in your car is one thing, but that was bordering on me asking her to stop. This isn't karaoke or your living room. Stop being annoying please.
FRIEND: Manwich really? Wow! I would not blame you for saying something to her. More importantly though who actually knows the Manwich theme song!
ME: It's actually someone saying “Manwhich, Manwhich, I want Manwich” over and over again to a classical music tune. It's actually a pretty common tune. You'd probably know it if you heard it. But it was still annoying. Yeah, I can’t be that rude without getting fired, but I could see how it would get on someone's nerves to the point where they would blow up.
FRIEND: I guess if it was classical music it would make it that much harder to bare.
ME: Honestly, if this woman would have stopped when the commercial did I probably wouldn't have been so irritated with it, but she just kept humming through the next commercial until another one she knew came on :\
FRIEND: Was she senile?
ME: No. But she did get really excited when i took her back to her room. I said "we're going to have you here in room three" and she shoots her hands in the air and yells out "woo hoo! room three!" so she might just be on mass amounts of drugs.
FRIEND: Yes! Drugs! That is the only explanation for this! I never remember getting excited over which room the doctor put me in. I am going to do that next appointment!
ME: when they are walking you down the hall you should start muttering things like "come on room four, do i have a room four?" like Vegas roulette crazies.
FRIEND: I will do that while humming the Manwich theme song!
ME: have fun with that
FRIEND: You are my emergency contact so expect a phone call from my doctor committing me.
Okay, so is it just me or was this really an amusing tale?
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