Thursday, March 19, 2009

Can I Have the Model Number?

I don't know about anyone else out there, but I really do enjoy screwing with telemarketers. Nothing too obnoxious, I mean, they are real people just making a living too, right? It's not their fault that they are making my job annoying and miserable by calling, I suppose. It's the small pleasures in life that make it all worthwhile and one of my small pleasures is messing with these people. Mostly, its just a game around the office. The guy calls up and says, "Hi, I represent the people who got you your copier and we want to send you a new catalog. Can you give me the model number on your copier?" Right away I know this is a lie. First of all, I know the people that sold us our copier. She was in a couple weeks ago with a new brochure and if she wanted the model number she would have got it then. So its pretty obvious that this guy's whole job revolves around screwing over unsuspecting receptionists who have no clue who sold them their copier. So I immediately say to the guy, "Sure! Hold on." Then I start talking bets around the office for how long we can get the guy to stay on hold for. Today I was the only one in the office so it wasn't quite as entertaining as it usually is. It did cheer me up a little to know that whatever commission this guy may make on these calls was totally lost for the six minutes he stayed on hold. You'd think they'd learn the places they call and stop calling the ones that already know their game.
I am also fond of telling telemarketers that they have to talk to my boss and then let her bitch them out. Hey, she has a door on her office and I'm out in the open. If our patients hear my telling someone to fuck off they might get offended or some bullshit. There isn't really a lot of damage I can do to these people since I am supposed to be acting professional and all, but the little things really do make it worthwhile.